Eleventh Sense

Warning: Containing spoilers, this review is as bad as the film.

The director had done a ctrl c ctrl v of an English film earlier which he ctrl ved in Hindi. He now thinks he must make something original for Tamil. So he takes his pen out, brings Vijay TV’s Nijam Nadandadu Enna Voice over and introduces to us about the long lost glory of Tamil culture and some Bodhi Dharman. And the Chinese sing a Tamil song in Babablacksheep tune. Check.

Present day and we have Baby Grand (Grand is the nickname of Kamal Hassan who speaks every language including American English with a grand American accent. Also, he is a grand actor) asking the hero for a monkey to do genetic research with a beautiful oh-so-louly-tambrahm accent. Must tell the director that monkey research is banned in India (monkey being Aanjaneyar, etc, etc). But I will not because I am a proud Tamil and also, a geneticist. Check.

Now this Baby Grand and the hero go on elephants on Adyar Bridge, sing Chinese Tamil songs with American accents in Europe with African extras composed by Harris Jayaraj. Globalization of Tamil. Check. Now she wants to use the hero to do genetic experiments. Ethical clearance anyone? No questions because this is a film on Tamil culture. She goes to a room to talk about her project to world famous Indian scientists who are 50+, talk about their lives’ works in one sentence, are from Ulundurpettai and speak English and mock Tamil culture. Baby grand from Paramakudi launches into a tirade on why the Tamil is the glorious, speaking Tamil in an American accent. Another grand in the making. Check.

She wants to use the hero to bring back whoever is his ancestor, with the DNA, in the hero. Must ask prof if this really works. If so, must take DNA from Murugadoss and see if it matches with the DNA of any filmmaker. If so, must bring back filmmaking talent. Bleddy around ears heavy jasmine smell raa. But I will not question because jasmine is also part of Tamil culture. Check.

This Dong Lee is a Chinki villain speaking English with an Indian accent in China. More globalization of the cinematazation of the constitution of the constipation. He causes crisis to Indian economy with baby grand’s prof. So Surudhi goes to prof’s house, hacks into prof’s gmail account and unearths mollamaarithanam of 300 crores of transaction of single wire transfer into Swiss account. Using monkeys in India, genetic testing without ethical clearance, hacking other’s accounts. Crime rate increasingly grandly. But no questions because she is pro-Tamil culture. Check. The Dong uses dog to cause disease. Seriyana bong pa. And baby grand asks him if he has yellow rice in the chest to meet this Bodhi Karman face to face and how dare he cause harm to the great India of the Aryabhatta, Pallavas, TR, Sam Anderson, Perarasu and Digvijay Singh. Yabba.

So finally she takes our hero, puts him in a box with Discovery channel deep sea diving material for 12 days in an ultra secretive place where they have no contact with the outer world in IIT Madras. So the take home message is that the most vetty place in Chennai with no scent of human activity is IIT. Mr. Director, I want to know the funding for baby grand’s research.  And in the midst of all this mumbo-jumbo being passed as logic and science, the hero becomes Bodhi Dharman. Enna karumam da saami!

The film’s concept is good, it tries something different, first 20 minutes are well filmed and the reference to Gounder was the only LOL worthy moment in the film. Thasall that’s there to this film. Murugadoss, making a film on Tamil culture, science and DNA and all is ok. But next time, if it is about science, include something called research and if it is a film, screenplay. Thanks.

PS: Does the title or this rant make sense? No, neither does the film.

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5 Comments

Filed under Filim, Gounder, Review

5 responses to “Eleventh Sense

  1. ags

    vijay tv voice over- nice kalaai 🙂
    read my kalaai of 7th sense too http://ags70mm.blogspot.com/2011/10/where-is-seventh-sense-searching.html

  2. Hilarious. My sentiments (or the lack of it) exactly!

  3. Machi. The LOL moment for me in the movie was when Shruti observes DNA under a fucking optical microscope. Semaya feel aayiten…

  4. Divya

    Really cool post.. Your writing style is very witty and makes me Laugh out loud! Looking forward to seeing more of ur writing to keep us entertained with our famous madras tanglish 🙂

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